Titus: All in The Family

Titus: All in The Family  

Are you part of a church family, or just a fan club? It's easy to fall into the "CEO" (Christmas and Easter Only) mindset, treating church like a forced holiday where we only show up for the big events. But a healthy church isn't built on one hyped-up Sunday; it’s built on the everyday, ordinary consistency of being a family the other 364 days of the year. 
In this message, we dive into Paul's letter to Titus to discover how God designs His church. We explore why healthy churches start with structure rather than excitement, how discipleship flows through generations, and why our behavior in the world serves as a powerful public witness. God doesn’t abandon messy churches—He orders them. 

Reader's Version

 Titus: All in The Family  

Sermon by Gene Simco  

Reader’s Version 

The Hallmark Holiday 

You know you’re in a living, breathing church when people actually skip Easter! 

I know that sounds crazy because most churches go all-out for Easter, but it actually happens here. It happens because we are not a "CEO Church"—Christmas and Easter Only. And honestly, that makes total sense. If, as we saw in Timothy, the church is meant to be modeled after a household, it changes everything. 

In my house, my wife and I actually do not celebrate what we call "Hallmark holidays." On Valentine's Day, for example, we hate the forced romance, the crowded restaurants, and the overpriced, dumbed-down menus. We don't need a special calendar day to prove we care about each other, because we genuinely love each other the other 364 days of the year! 

Unfortunately, that is exactly what church is like for many regular attendees on Christmas and Easter. It often feels fake and forced. Easter can sometimes feel like the Valentine's Day of the Christian world! But a healthy church isn't built on one big, hyped-up Sunday. It is built on the everyday, ordinary consistency of being a true family and loving Jesus all year round. 

Today, we are going to look at the biblical family model for the church. 

A Field Manual for Family 

Prior to Easter, we walked through 1st and 2nd Timothy. We looked heavily at leadership qualifications, silencing false teachers, and the absolute danger of drifting from sound doctrine. 

Titus is very similar, but it is not just a repeat. It is a field manual for family. It is the exact same theology, but in a totally different setting. 

Timothy was left in Ephesus, dealing with complex, theological chaos. He was dealing with a lot of competing religions (like the massive Temple of Artemis) in a city that acted like a "spiritual Disneyland." Titus, on the other hand, is left on the island of Crete, and he finds himself dealing with absolute moral chaos. 

But Paul's solution in both places is identical: Order the household. 

He doesn't rely on charisma. He doesn't rely on crowds. He doesn't seek cultural relevance, and he doesn't try to compete with the surrounding pagan worldviews. Healthy churches don't start with excitement; they start with family structure! And Paul is crystal clear right from the opening line: this structure isn't optional, and it isn't democratic. 

If you read straight through the book of Titus, you will immediately notice a few major themes: a repeated emphasis on good works, front-loaded leadership qualifications, intense household language, the concept of submission to authority as a Gospel witness, and a brilliant teaching on grace that trains rather than grace that excuses. 

Historical Insight: The Jerusalem Test Case Before we look at the letter, we have to look at the man. Who is Titus? To understand his Family Foundation, you have to look back at the timeline of Acts 15 and Galatians 2. When Paul went to the massive Jerusalem Council to violently debate the "Judaizers" over whether Gentiles had to get circumcised and follow the Law of Moses to follow Jesus, he specifically brought Titus with him as "Exhibit A." Titus was a Greek. He was the living, breathing proof that grace alone brings you into the family of God! 

This is incredibly important today. Paul had Timothy circumcised (Acts 16) out of missional deference to the Jews in that specific region. But he absolutely refused to have Titus circumcised! Titus stands as a living rebuke to those modern groups (like the Hebrew Roots movement) who try to drag Christians back under the bondage of Old Testament law. 

 The Spiritual DNA 

Next, we see the deep family connection between Paul and this young pastor. 

Titus 1:4 (NLT): 

"This letter is from Paul... to Titus, my true son in the faith that we share." 

Greek Insight: Teknon When Paul calls Titus his "true son," he uses the Greek word teknon [τέκνον]. This does not just mean a student, a protégé, or a mentee. Teknon implies a born child—someone who actually shares your inherent nature and DNA. 

Right out of the gate, Paul is tearing down the corporate church model. Titus isn't Paul's employee; he is his spiritual son. The church in Crete isn't a franchise; it's a household! 

Ordering the Unfinished House 

Paul gives Titus a massive assignment: order the unfinished house. Paul leaves him in Crete to "set in order what remains." That specific phrase tells us that the church was unfinished, not broken. 

So, how do you finish a church? You don't build a bigger stage. You build a family structure. 

Titus 1:5–9 (NLT): 

"I left you on the island of Crete so you could complete our work there and appoint elders in each town as I instructed you. An elder must live a blameless life. He must be faithful to his wife, and his children must be believers who don’t have a reputation for being wild or rebellious. A church leader is a manager of God’s household, so he must live a blameless life. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered; he must not be a heavy drinker, violent, or dishonest with money. Rather, he must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must love what is good. He must live wisely and be just. He must live a devout and disciplined life. He must have a strong belief in the trustworthy message he was taught; then he will be able to encourage others with wholesome teaching and show those who oppose it where they are wrong." 

There are many similarities here to 1 Timothy 3. The leaders are to be appointed, not elected. Leadership in God's house is not invented by culture; it's appointed by God to stabilize the church, rather than based on who has the biggest fan base! Popularity contests might work for a high school student council, but they will completely destroy a spiritual household. 

Notice the exact same requirement: character precedes gifting. 

You look at the leader's family (his wife and his kids). Then you look at his character (wise, just, devout, disciplined, and full of self-control). It is only after he has these things that he is permitted to use his one required skill: teaching. 

Why? Because the family life of a leader is the proving ground. If a leader cannot manage his own household with grace, truth, and order, he has absolutely no business trying to manage God's household. 

The Threat to the Family 

Finally, there is a massive threat to the family: the false teachers. 

Crete was infamous for its moral laxity. But notice that Paul doesn't soften the biblical standards to reach them—he actively raises them. 

Titus 1:10–14 (NLT): 

"For there are many rebellious people who engage in useless talk and deceive others. This is especially true of those who insist on circumcision for salvation. They must be silenced, because they are turning whole families away from the truth by their false teaching. And they do it only for money. Even one of their own men, a prophet from Crete, has said about them, 'The people of Crete are all liars, cruel animals, and lazy gluttons.' This is true. So reprimand them sternly to make them strong in the faith. They must stop listening to Jewish myths and the commands of people who have turned away from the truth." 

Paul quotes Epimenides, an ancient Cretan philosopher. It is clearly a bit of hyperbole (otherwise Paul wouldn't have been able to find any qualified elders on the island!). But the threat is real. These teachers are spreading myths and divisions, and they are doing it entirely for the money. 

False teachers are not corrected by "good vibes" or by ignoring the problem. They are silenced by truth, example, and authority. 

Why does this matter so much? Look at Paul's motivation in verse 11: they are "ruining whole families for the sake of dishonest gain." This is why we protect the household of God! 

The Poison of a Corrupted Conscience 

As we just saw, false teachers are not corrected by coddling them; they are silenced by truth, example, and authority. The motivation here—why this matters so much—is because these false teachers are ruining whole families, and they are doing it purely for the sake of dishonest gain. 

Paul continues with this family theme and zeroes in on the internal corruption of these deceivers. 

Titus 1:15–16 (NLT): 

"Everything is pure to those whose hearts are pure. But nothing is pure to those who are corrupt and unbelieving, because their minds and consciences are corrupted. Such people claim they know God, but they deny him by the way they live. They are detestable and disobedient, worthless for doing anything good." 

Just like today, there are many people who loudly claim to know God. We have talked in the past about the "Christian poison" that people are actively peddling. They use all the right religious vocabulary, but they absolutely deny Him by the way they live their lives. The Bible talks extensively about this reality, but modern Christians have largely chosen to ignore it because they want a comfortable, consequence-free religion. 

Yes, we are saved entirely by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. Ephesians 2:8-9 makes it clear that we are saved by grace so that no one can boast. But the modern church often stops reading there! They completely ignore the other side of that point in the very next verse. 

Ephesians 2:10 (NLT): 

"For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago." 

It is incredibly important that we grasp this: Saved trees produce good fruit. If your life is devoid of good works, your claim to know God is completely worthless. 

The Bridge to Chapter Two: Protecting the Household 

Before we cross into chapter two, I want to hop back and put a heavy focus on verse 11. It is the absolute hinge of Paul's argument. Look at the literal translation of Titus 1:11 (using the Lexham English Bible): 

"whom it is necessary to silence, whoever are ruining whole families by teaching things which must not be taught for the sake of dishonest gain." 

Greek Insight: Overturning the Household When Paul says these false teachers are "ruining whole families," he uses the Greek phrase holous oikous anatrepousin [ὅλους οἴκους ἀνατρέπουσιν]. The word anatrepō literally means to overturn, capsize, or completely subvert. False teaching doesn't just confuse individuals in a vacuum; it capsizes the entire structural foundation of the family unit. Because the local church is fundamentally a collection of households, capsizing the family effectively capsizes the church. 

In Titus, the entire focus is on the family. That is the threat. And this specific verse—the urgent command to stop those who are overturning households—is the exact bridge that connects directly into the instructions of chapter two! 

Chapter Two: The Family Tree 

We see the church as a household. It is entirely about family structure, not corporate programming. 

This second chapter is the absolute heart of the book of Titus. Paul is outlining exactly how a healthy church actually functions, and it begins with the character of the household. 

Titus 2:1-3 (NLT): 

"As for you, Titus, promote the kind of living that reflects wholesome teaching. Teach the older men to exercise self-control, to be worthy of respect, and to live wisely. They must have sound faith and be filled with love and patience. Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers. Instead, they should teach others what is good." 

Again, we see this incredibly strong emphasis on teaching from example. The virtues of self-control, wisdom, love, and patience come up again and again. 

But notice carefully what Paul doesn't say! 

He doesn't tell Titus, "Appeal to the island's demographics. Segment the church by consumer preferences. Build hyper-specific, age-based ministries." Yet, that is exactly what we see in much of the church world today. 

Instead of corporate programming, Paul gives Titus a family tree: older men, older women, younger women, younger men, and leaders. This is an organic family structure. The church does not grow by attracting fans to a stage; it grows by forming a family that actually does life together, not apart! 

The Transfer of Character 

This process is called discipleship. You can always tell the true nature of a teacher by looking at their students. 

Here is where discipleship becomes massive in the church: the pastoral character that Paul demanded of the leaders in Chapter One is supposed to transfer directly to the members in Chapter Two. 

If you belong to this family, your conduct reflects on the head of the household, and ultimately, it reflects on Jesus Christ Himself. 

Look at the serious warning Paul gives regarding the behavior of the church family, specifically warning the women of the church in Titus 2:5 (NLT): 

"to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God." 

Where the NLT says "bring shame," the original Greek literally translates to "be blasphemed." 

Theological Insight: Blaspheming the Word Most Christians immediately associate the word "blasphemy" with the Unforgivable Sin mentioned by Jesus in Mark 3:28-29. In that famous passage, the religious leaders watched Jesus perform undeniable miracles of grace by the power of the Holy Spirit, but they maliciously claimed He was possessed by Satan. They attributed the saving work of God to the devil! 

Because of Mark 3, "blasphemy" is a terrifying, serious word in the Christian faith. But what many believers don't realize is that Paul uses the exact same Greek root word (blasphemeo) right here in Titus 2:5! He warns that when Christians live rebellious, chaotic, or hypocritical lives, they actually cause the outside world to "blaspheme" the Word of God. A lot of people don't know they can do that. Our bad behavior can literally cause the secular world to speak evil of the Gospel! 

The Undeniable Gospel 

At the end of Chapter One, Paul warned about people who boldly profess to know God, but deny Him by their works. 

This is the great danger we face: when the church family constantly argues, bites, rebels, and acts just like the world, we are practically slandering the Gospel. We blaspheme the very message of grace we claim saved us! 

But when our family life is ordered, loving, and submitting to one another under God's authority, it makes the Gospel absolutely undeniable to the outside world. We are called to witness to the world with our works. 

When the family operates the way God designed it, the result is exactly what Paul promises in Titus 2:10b (NLT): 

"Then they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive in every way." 

Chapter Three: Missional Discipline and Public Witness 

The final chapter of Titus focuses heavily on submission, good works, and public witness. We have to have missional discipline. Paul commands the church to be submissive to rulers and authorities. This directly intersects with the hard theology of Romans 13 and 1 Peter 2. 

Submission to governing authorities isn't a weakness; it is missional discipline! 

Greek Insight: The True Meaning of "Martyr" It is important to take a moment here to understand what the word "martyr" actually means, because it has been heavily corrupted today. Many people think of a martyr in the context of other faiths or worldviews as someone who blows other people up. But the Greek word martys [μάρτυς] simply means witness. That's all it means! It later came to mean "someone who dies as a witness," because in early Christianity, if you witnessed publicly, you were highly likely to die. The ultimate witness was a witness unto death. When Roman soldiers watched early Christians die for their faith rather than recant, it profoundly got their attention. They would watch these executions and say, "Wow, they must really believe in this."  

We are commanded to submit to government authorities, and a lot of Christians are shocked to read commands like "Honor the king" in places like 1 Peter 2. The kings of that time were actively killing Christians! The emperor Nero famously burned Christians alive to light his gardens. That is likely what Peter was looking at when he wrote about the "fiery trials" they were facing. 

When the world looks at the church, they shouldn't see a subversive political action committee. They should see people so utterly secure in their Heavenly King that they don't have to panic and rebel against their earthly ones! 

Look at the commands of the Apostles: 

Titus 3:1-2 (NLT): "Remind the believers to submit to the government and its officers. They should be obedient, always ready to do what is good. They must not slander anyone and must avoid quarreling. Instead, they should be gentle and show true humility to everyone." 

Romans 13:1 (NLT): "Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God." 

1 Peter 2:17-19 (NLT): "Respect everyone, and love the family of believers. Fear God, and respect the king. You who are slaves must submit to your masters with all respect. Do what they tell you—not only if they are kind and reasonable, but even if they are cruel. For God is pleased when, conscious of his will, you patiently endure unjust treatment." 

Let's look at what submission is and what it isn't. We have to be crystal clear here: Paul is not saying that governments are perfect. He isn't saying that authorities never abuse their power. Remember, Paul is writing this while the brutal Roman Empire is in power! There is certainly much abuse and violence going on toward Christians. 

What Paul is saying is this: Chaos is not Christian. We shouldn't expect fair treatment, but rebellion is not holiness. We must not slander, we must not argue, and we must be respectful even when it is completely unfair. Visible order reflects a deep trust in God's sovereignty. If we read the rest of these passages, Paul and Peter make it very clear that Jesus will ultimately bring the justice, and we trust Him to do it. 

The Anchor of Grace: The Titus 3 Creed 

So how do we actually pull this kind of radical humility and submission off in a chaotic world? Paul tells us in Titus 3:3 to remember who we used to be: foolish, disobedient, and enslaved to our passions. We didn't save ourselves. 

Titus 3:4-7 (NLT): 

"But—When God our Savior revealed his kindness and love, he saved us, not because of the righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He washed away our sins, giving us a new birth and new life through the Holy Spirit. He generously poured out the Spirit upon us through Jesus Christ our Savior. Because of his grace he made us right in his sight and gave us confidence that we will inherit eternal life." 

This beautiful creed reminds us that salvation comes completely from God, washing us and renewing us through the Holy Spirit. This wasn't a new concept Paul invented on the spot. This is the exact fulfillment of what the Old Testament prophets promised God would do for His people. 

 The "Agape" Myth and the Philanthropia of God
Almost every mainstream pastor who doesn’t actually read Greek loves to preach the classic "Agape" sermon. You know the one: they claim that Agape is a supreme, unconditional love that only God possesses, while Phileo is just a lesser, human, "brotherly" love. It sounds incredibly deep and spiritual from the stage. There is just one massive problem with it: the New Testament proves it wrong.

Look no further than Titus 3:4.

When the Apostle Paul describes the ultimate, divine, saving love of God stepping into human history to rescue us, he writes: "But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared..." The Greek word Paul uses here for God's divine, saving love is not agape. It is philanthropia (φιλανθρωπία)—a compound of philos (brotherly love) and anthropos (mankind).

God’s supreme, saving love for the world is literally described using the exact root word that mainstream pastors write off as a "lesser" human love! The truth is, the biblical writers didn't use magical vocabulary tricks to explain God. They took everyday Greek words and filled them with the unmatched, undeniable character of Christ. God's love isn't defined by a rigid Greek dictionary; it is defined by the cross.

Saved FOR Works 

Next, we see that we are saved for works. Notice the progression of the Gospel in that creed: God saves us by His mercy, He renews us by His Spirit, and the immediate result is a completely transformed life. We weren't saved by works—there is no merit badge you can earn to get into the family of God—but we are absolutely saved for works! 

Titus 3:8-11 (NLT): 

"This is a trustworthy saying, and I want you to insist on these teachings so that all who trust in God will devote themselves to doing good. These teachings are good and beneficial for everyone. Do not get involved in foolish discussions about spiritual pedigrees or in quarrels and fights about obedience to Jewish laws. These things are useless and a waste of time. If people are causing divisions among you, give a first and second warning. After that, have nothing more to do with them. For people like that have turned away from the truth, and their own sins condemn them." 

Here we see the command: Do good works, don't argue, and cause no divisions! This lines up with everything we read previously in the New Testament. In Romans, the point was unity. In Ephesians, the point was unity. In 1 Corinthians, Paul pleads for no divisions in God's household. 

Paul drives this home in Titus 3: Insist on these things so that believers will devote themselves to good works. Let this sink in: Grace that doesn't change your behavior is not biblical grace. 

The Dismantled Modern Church 

The book of Titus completely dismantles the modern church model. There are no elections, no fan bases, and no platform building. The church is a household with fathers and mothers, with accountability, with shared responsibility, and with visible order. Leadership is not about control; it is about care. And when that order collapses, the Gospel message collapses with it. 

Christ is at the center. Jesus is not a mascot! He is the Head of the household. He appoints shepherds, He defines authority, He models submission, and He redeems families. 

Titus isn't about tightening religious rules. It is about reflecting Christ's household order to a watching world. And none of this was new. It wasn't a panic strategy by Paul. This has been God's design from the very beginning. 

The Alpha and the Omega: God’s Consistent Design 

So, let's look back at the "Alpha"—the Old Testament foundations. When we look at Paul's instructions to Titus, we realize that none of this was a new invention. God's design for His people has been perfectly consistent from the very beginning. 

Old Testament Insight: The Alpha Foundation The brilliance of the book of Titus is that Paul is taking ancient, Old Testament principles (the "Alpha") and applying them directly to the New Testament church. By placing these scriptures side-by-side, we see that God has always cared deeply about how His household is ordered, how His people witness to the world, and how His Spirit brings true transformation. 

Let’s look at how perfectly the Old Testament blueprint mirrors the New Testament church in Crete. 

1. Leadership is Appointed, Not Elected 

In the Old Testament, qualified leaders were set in place for the good of the people. Competence and character always mattered more than popularity. 

The Alpha (Exodus 18:21-22, NLT): "But select from all the people some capable, honest men who fear God and hate bribes. Appoint them as leaders over groups of one thousand, one hundred, fifty, and ten. They should always be available to solve the people’s common disputes." 

The Omega (Titus 1:5, 9, NLT): "I left you on the island of Crete so you could complete our work there and appoint elders in each town as I instructed you... He must have a strong belief in the trustworthy message he was taught; then he will be able to encourage others with wholesome teaching and show those who oppose it where they are wrong." 

Titus mirrors Exodus perfectly. Elders are installed to stabilize the church and protect the household from chaos. 

2. The Ordered House of Discipleship 

God has always formed His people through household-shaped discipleship. Truth must be taught, modeled, and lived out daily in the home. 

The Alpha (Deuteronomy 6:6-7, NLT): "And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up." 

The Omega (Titus 2:1-3, 6, NLT): "As for you, Titus, promote the kind of living that reflects wholesome teaching. Teach the older men to exercise self-control... Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God... In the same way, encourage the young men to live wisely." 

Titus applies that exact same home formation to community formation within the church. Spiritual maturity naturally flows downward and outward through the generations. 

 3. Submission to Authorities as Public Witness 

God told the exiles in Babylon to pursue the good of the pagan city they were living in, even under highly imperfect rulers. Why? Because God's people do not exist to burn everything down; they exist to bear witness! 

The Alpha (Jeremiah 29:7, NLT): "And work for the peace and prosperity of the city where I sent you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, for its welfare will determine your welfare." 

The Omega (Titus 3:1-2, NLT): "Remind the believers to submit to the government and its officers. They should be obedient, always ready to do what is good. They must not slander anyone and must avoid quarreling. Instead, they should be gentle and show true humility to everyone." 

Titus echoes that exact, ancient posture: orderly conduct and peaceable speech radically adorn the Gospel in a chaotic culture. 

4. Mercy, Cleansing, and New Life 

God promised through the Old Testament prophets that He would one day bring a total cleansing, a new heart, and His own Spirit. Salvation is total transformation. 

The Alpha (Ezekiel 36:25-27, NLT): "Then I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean. Your filth will be washed away, and you will no longer worship idols. And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart. And I will put my Spirit in you so you will follow my decrees and be careful to obey my regulations." 

The Omega (Titus 3:4-6, NLT): "But—When God our Savior revealed his kindness and love, he saved us, not because of the righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He washed away our sins, giving us a new birth and new life through the Holy Spirit. He generously poured out the Spirit upon us through Jesus Christ our Savior." 

Titus describes the exact, breathtaking fulfillment of this ancient prophecy in Christ. God saves us strictly by His mercy and the washing of renewal—not by our own merit—producing an entirely new kind of life! 

The Discipleship Reality: The Teacher and the Students 

For us, we must realize that we have to reflect Christ as a family. We see this heavily in the reality of discipleship. Discipleship always comes from the top down. 

You can always tell the true character of a teacher by looking at their students. 

This brings us circling back to a massive theme in Paul's letter: discipleship. The strict pastoral character that Paul demanded of the leaders in Chapter One is supposed to transfer directly into the lives of the church members in Chapter Two. 

This is a concept I am very familiar with from my past life. I have shared my heart with you in weeks past, and I've been open about the fact that yes, I do have a past! I am a born-again Christian; I wasn't born as a pastor. Maybe I have a little more "past" than others do, but as we saw earlier, the Apostle Paul also had quite a past. He was literally murdering Christians before he met Jesus! 

Well, in my past, I was a musician, and then I spent years as a Mixed Martial Arts and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu teacher. One absolute truth I learned in the martial arts world is that you can always tell what the teacher is like by how the students treat you. 

When you went in to spar with them (what we call "rolling"), you could immediately identify the culture of the instructor. If the students were overly aggressive, if they held on to a submission choke a little too long after you tapped out, or if they were foul-mouthed on the mat, you knew immediately that this was how the teacher acted behind closed doors. 

I have been in contact with many famous martial arts teachers, and a lot of them put on a highly manufactured persona. I remember one very famous Jiu-Jitsu practitioner who was always incredibly friendly in public. Everyone would constantly remark about how nice this guy was at tournaments, during book signings, or while taking pictures with fans. But whenever I went to train at his actual school, his students were extremely aggressive, arrogant, and downright mean. I always wondered, "How did they get like this?" 

Years later, the truth came out. There was an incident where this "friendly," highly trained martial artist went completely out of his way to drive to a local gas station just to physically assault a guy working there. Why? Because earlier that day, his wife had broken a traffic rule in the parking lot, the worker yelled at her, and the instructor drove all the way down there to beat him up. It took a while, but his true, violent character eventually came out. His students were reflecting who he actually was the whole time! 

The Church Persona 

This exact same principle is true in the church and in Christianity in general. 

A lot of pastors present themselves one way on the stage, but their people act a completely different way in the community. Eventually, the truth comes out through scandals. You might look at a church and see rampant promiscuity, or people openly having affairs. You might see a youth group where, right after the Wednesday night message, the kids are making out or smoking pot in the church parking lot. 

Usually, it doesn't take very long to find out that the pastors and leaders are also engaging in lax, sinful behavior behind the scenes. At first, the pastor seems nice, and the crowd seems welcoming, but then, all of a sudden, a massive moral scandal breaks. 

To us, this means character. If you belong to this family, your conduct reflects on the head of the household. If we live like the world, it ultimately makes Jesus look bad and makes the Gospel look less attractive to those who desperately need it. 

Lead by Attraction, Not Promotion 

Let's review the core of Chapter Two: we don't slander anyone, and we don't argue, because doing so slanders the Gospel itself. His family must reflect His character. We have to ask ourselves a very hard question: Are we making the faith attractive in every way? 

We must lead by attraction, not just aggressive promotion. 

Many Christians today are trying to force non-Christians to believe by over-promoting, being nasty about politics, and hypocritically pointing fingers at everyone else's sin. They will pick their favorite sin in the secular culture and attack it relentlessly. They think they are going to attract people to the church by screaming, yelling, and making offensive posts on Facebook! 

But the Bible commands the exact opposite. 

Biblical Insight: Judging the Outsider When Christians aggressively attack the sins of the non-believing world, they are actually in direct rebellion against the Word of God. Look at Paul's explicit command in 1 Corinthians 5:12-13 (NLT): "It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning. God will judge those on the outside." We are commanded to respect the outside world, not judge them. We hold the church accountable to God's standard, and we offer the world God's grace! 

We actually commit a sin when we slander and judge those outside the church. If we are going to be a true church family—and not just a CEO (Christmas and Easter Only) church—we have to completely change the way we view this gathering. 

Dismantling the Content Consumption Church 

We need to stop treating church like content consumption. I think we do a pretty good job of avoiding that here, but we have to constantly remind ourselves never to drift there. 

This is exactly why we do not have a lot of highly segregated, age-based groups here at C3 Church. After reading Titus together, you can tell why: it is simply unbiblical. 

Most modern youth groups are being led by young people who are not biblically qualified to teach the Gospel. They don't have any children of their own, so how can they spiritually lead teenagers when they are practically children themselves? It doesn't make any sense, and it completely stifles the discipleship process! 

When we start segregating out the ages, we cut off the family tree. Older men have tons of life wisdom to share, and it is supposed to be shared with the younger men. It’s just like a healthy household! We learn from our grandparents, aunts, and uncles. The older women are commanded to teach the younger women. We don't need younger women trying to figure it out by only talking to other younger women! 

Ultimately, age segregation stifles biblical discipleship. 

The church in general needs to stop confusing popularity with calling. They are two very different things. A lot of people will pose as popular, build massive platforms, and collect a fan base. But a pastoral calling is about being appointed to lead a family, not a fan club. 

The modern church thinks it can just buy a flashy program and avoid the hard, organized work of discipleship. But if you belong to this family, you share the responsibility for its health. We rely on everyone for the health of the house—both the spiritual body and the physical building! As I mentioned in our Easter message, we use this building to serve the community. We are a true non-profit. We aren't promoting for the sake of profit; we are here to serve, and we need everyone to pitch in. 

Practical Steps for the Family 

Here is my encouragement and challenge to you regarding some practical next steps: 

Commit to Consistent Participation: Don't just settle for attendance. We don't just love each other on the "Hallmark holidays" like Easter. We show up for the messy, ordinary space in between. The church desperately needs your support as servants and stewards of Christ. 

Invest in Cross-Generational Relationships: Older men, find younger men. Older women, seek out younger women. This is exactly how the family tree grows! 

Engage in the Cafe: Take some time to go into the cafe after church today and intentionally seek out people. If you are older and you see a younger person sitting alone, go sit with them and ask them questions. Find out where the youth are coming from so you can speak wisdom into their exact standpoint. 

Listen More Than You Speak: To the younger people—it has been said that you have two ears and one mouth for a reason! If you are doing the talking, it should be asking questions. Ask the older generation for advice. While the culture has changed dramatically, the truth of the Bible remains exactly the same. 

Let Grace Train You: Let grace train your habits; do not use it to excuse them. Remember the Titus 3 creed: We weren't saved by works, but we were absolutely saved for works. 

God doesn't abandon messy churches; He orders them. He doesn't scrap broken families; He restores them. He doesn't chase cultural trends; He builds households. 

And when the church actually lives like a family, the world becomes undeniably attracted to something it just can't seem to explain. 

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©️ Copyright 2026 Gene Simco Most Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved. Scriptures in brackets reflect the original Biblical languages.

Titus: All in The Family

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